the future.

for whatever reason, lately i’ve really been thinking about the future.

i have this idea in my head… maybe i’ve written about it before. but i want to be a counselor when i grow up (which is a very vague, “elsewhere” notion that doesn’t seem to start until i’m out of college). i want to be a child counselor, actually. i love kids. they’re way easier to understand than adults, and they laugh at my jokes more. i’ve really been drawn to counseling kids with developmental disabilities or kids that communicate in typically a-typical ways, like kids with autism.

so i’m majoring in social work, because that’s what you do when you want to go into counseling. and it’s great as a major and i’m learning lots of stuff, and meeting new people and all that. but it kind of hit me the other day. i have this plan of mine, this relatively thought-out plan about what my life is going to be. i know what i want (i’m pretty sure, at least), i know what i love, and i know how i’m going to get there.

but just because i have a plan in mind does not mean any of it will actually happen.

God is One who predetermines. He has His plan already laid out. before time began, before i was born, before Jesus walked on earth, He knew exactly what brad hough would be doing after graduating. He doesn’t just know it—He designed it. and His plan might not include me doing all the things that i plan on doing. in bible study last night we were talking about how God is just so much… bigger than everything. all the things we look at in awe—people with money and power and influence, our significant others, some of the freaking amazing things and structures out there in nature, beautiful art—are like nothing to Him. time is no factor; isaiah 40 talks about how God blows on nations and they disintegrate. my plans mean absolutely nothing to Him. they probably make Him laugh.

“who has directed the Spirit of the Lord,
or as His counselor has informed Him?
with whom did He consult,
and who gave Him understanding?
and who taught Him the path of justice,
and taught Him knowledge
and the path to understanding?”
-isaiah 40:13-14

the answer here is, of course, no one. and yet i often try to do this. i try to let God know what the right choice is, or how He can maybe do things a little better. i get frustrated when my plans don’t work out, because they were so good! i am certain i had the best solutions to my problems. but how in the world does it make sense for me to try and talk sense into God, who knows me better than i know myself? i need a better perspective. when i think about it, i’m actually really, really glad that God didn’t receive His understanding from me. that would be disastrous.

but isaiah 40 also talks about how this same God that’s super beyond anything we can comprehend also wants to give us His strength, which never runs out or depletes. when we wait on Him, on His timing and His plan, we can rest, knowing that things will be good. this is something i’m slowly coming to terms with. and slowly, i’m becoming okay with it all. i mean, God’s plan has to be better, right? He’s God. He works all things out for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes. which is really comforting.

God knows what He’s doing.

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One thought on “the future.

  1. Jessica says:

    woah 2:04 am! how very you.

    I have been thinking about this a lot too. I met with Dr.Emert today to talk about my thesis and he said “where do you see yourself in 10 years?” and I kinda had my ideas but at the end I just said “I’ve stopped trying to figure it out.” It’s not our job to know.

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