two.

tomorrow’s the last day. i get to meet with as many people while packing frantically in between everything and getting my mind ready for the transition.

i was able to meet up with ryan and jake today. it was something i really wanted to do; they’re the graduating seniors i’m closest to, along with markus and bevin, who i’ll see tomorrow. it’s so interesting seeing them where i was a year ago. it doesn’t seem like an entire year… it’s almost as if their transitions have made mine more permanent. i know i mentioned earlier that i recognized a subconscious mentality that after a while in college i’d just go back to high school, to “real life” after i was done with the whole college phase. not so much like that anymore. which is good. i feel like i’m growing up when i see them.

love that will not betray you, dismay or enslave you,
it will set you free
to be more like the man you were made to be.

there is a designer, an alignment, a cry
of my heart to see
the beauty of love as it was made to be.


i found out today that jake likes mumford and sons too. we listened to a few songs on the way home.

darkness is a harsh term, don’t you think?
and yet it dominates the things i see

seems that all my bridges have been burned
but you say that’s exactly how this grace thing works

it’s not the long walk home that will change this heart
but the welcome i receive with a restart


i just keep liking them more and more as i listen to them. their sound is so full of texture and passion.

stars, hide your fires
these here are my desires
and i won’t give them up to you this time around

and so i’ll be found
with my stake stuck here in this ground
marking the territory of this
beauty-impassioned soul

you, you’ve gone too far this time
you have neither reason nor rhyme
with which to take this soul that is so rightfully mine.


their lyrics are so rich and really, though they don’t label themselves as christian by any means, many beautiful truths about God and His character can be found without much interpretation. just one more here:
 
can you lie next to her
and give her your heart, your heart
as well as your body
and can you lie next to her
and confess your love, your love
as well as your folly

and can you kneel before the king
and say i’m clean, i’m clean

oh tell me now, where was my fault
in loving you with my whole heart?

ah. i love it. i recently discovered pandora, so i’ve been listening to a mix of sara groves, mumford and sons, and steven curtis chapman. jake introduced me to a band called civil wars today who had some pretty beautiful harmonies, so i think i’ll check them out soon.

i feel like i’m avoiding something. besides packing; i’ll do that tomorrow.

i guess i’ll avoid it a little longer. i’m going to read and journal and go to bed. two days, people. two days.

if only i had an enemy
bigger than my apathy
i could have won.
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