five.

it’s been a long while since i last wrote. i feel like part of me was avoiding it for some reason. i know this will serve as my blog for the summer as well, and i think in the back of my head i was thinking that writing in it meant that camp was coming closer. i don’t know… things i think don’t often make sense. but i’m back and i’m writing, and it feels good.

many things have happened, of course.

i leave in five days. that is insane. these past two weeks have been chock full of things that i wanted to get done and people i wanted to see, which was really nice.

1.) i met up with jordan last week and ended up having a really awesome time just talking for a few hours, just driving around. the police came and made us get out of the car after i parked in the fortress of fun parking lot… that was great… but we were fine.

2.) i also got to grab dinner with joshua long, which was great. he’s a great kid and i always enjoy hanging out with him.

3.) spent a weekend with matt, dylan and christian. those guys are, i’ve realized, my best friends back home. they’re just the kind of guys i can have fun with and hang out even though we don’t see each other for the majority of the year. matt said he’d try and visit when i’m up at camp, which would be awesome.

4.) ale and i got to catch up a bit, which was good.

5.) brady and i met up, and we actually ran into jeremy brown and his friend lindsey at starbucks. we stayed and talked for a few hours, longer than i thought we would, and i really enjoyed it.

6.) this morning seth and i grabbed breakfast and caught up. it was great to see him outside of younglife. i feel like there’s been a slight transition from superior to equal, if that makes any sense. it was a great time.

7.) tonight i just had a blast with bec down at the river, and then back home for a movie. i’ve begun to realize just how much i’m going to miss her. this’ll be the longest we’ve been apart… ever, really, though. that sounds crazy, but it’s true. it’ll be tough. but we’ll skype and stuff, so it won’t be too bad.

i’m still planning times with other people. i hate being frantic about cramming time with everyone in, because it just makes thing less enjoyable, you know?

i know i keep saying i’m really excited for camp, and i am, but right now i’m just nervous. i’m nervous about not knowing exactly what to do. i’m nervous about the guy i’m going to be leading with. i’m nervous that everyone seems to be returning and therefore knows what to do except me. everyone i’ve talked to says that i’ll be great at this job, that the kids will be fun and i’ll really enjoy myself. but i’m nervous that that won’t be the case. i’m nervous that i’ll get groups of kids that don’t respond well to me at all. i’m nervous that i’ll be so surrounded by God stuff that my relationship with Him will suffer. i’m nervous about forgetting things or bringing too many things.

right now i just want another week at home. some of the staff is already there and everything, and they’re talking about how awesome it is. i’m worried that i just won’t be the same way.

and then i take a step back and get annoyed with myself because obviously it’s going to be an amazing time.

yeah. it’s gonna be awesome.

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